In Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, sisters Amelia and Emily Nagoski argue that stress itself isn’t the main issue—it’s that our coping strategies fail to address the body’s physiological response to stress. They suggest that being “well” isn’t about constantly feeling calm and safe, but about moving fluidly between moments of adversity and peace. It’s about experiencing stress and knowing how to return to a state of calm and recovery.

Stress isn’t inherently harmful; it’s when we get stuck in the stress response that problems arise. The Nagoskis emphasise the importance of distinguishing between the stressor and the stress response, as they need to be addressed in different ways.

For example, imagine almost avoiding a cycling accident. While the external stressor (the crash) has been resolved, the body’s stress response remains. We might still feel shaky and have a racing heart, but we do not stop and complete the stress cycle.  We are taught not to cry and probably get up, grab our bike and pretend we are ok. Even though the immediate danger has passed, our body hasn’t fully caught up. 

This scenario illustrates how many of us live under constant stress without sufficient recovery. When our sympathetic nervous system activates, our body prepares for fight or flight. Essentially, stress makes our body ready for action. To release that stress, movement is key—shake it out!

Animals instinctively do this. Think of a gazelle escaping from a lion. Once the danger passes, it doesn’t just return to grazing peacefully. It shakes, prances, and leaps around to release the stress of the chase. Afterward, it returns to a calm state. Children often display similar behavior, but as adults, we’re socially conditioned not to show distress—no shaking or crying allowed.

So, if you’re feeling stressed, shaking your body can really help. Just get up and start shaking your torso and limbs—there’s no right or wrong way to do it. Trust your body; it instinctively knows what to do. Additionally, engaging in physical activity is one of the best ways to reset, whether it’s running, yoga, or dancing.

Yoga is especially beneficial, as it incorporates breathing, and Breathwork has been shown to stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system’s rest-and-relax branch, triggering the body’s relaxation response. You’ll likely experience that inner sigh—ahhh, I feel okay again.

Feature Image by Rubēn Sānchez. @Zoonchez

Learn more about the Artist:  www.iamrubensanchez.com/about